


Too Much

by WolfaMoon



Category: Star Trek, Star Trek 2009, Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon, Empathic!McCoy, M/M, Protective Kirk, Starfleet Academy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-03-13
Updated: 2013-03-13
Packaged: 2017-12-05 05:08:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 14,338
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/719215
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WolfaMoon/pseuds/WolfaMoon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Empathic McCoy feeling the Destruction of the fleet. Star Trek 2009.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. 1: Too Many -2: Discovery

Chapter 1: Too Many  
To Many  
By Wolfa Moon  
Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Just had an interesting idea. Watched ST: TOS 'The Empath' thought wouldn't it be great to have Bones have that, but keep his wonderful drawl. Reading a lot of great fics. Awesome job to every writer out there. Please be kind.  
Summary: Empathic McCoy and the Destruction of the fleet. Star Trek 2009.

Too Many

They had just ran onto the bridge and the crew focused on them.  
The three, Spock, Kirk, Pike, were arguing about what Kirk was telling them about. Pike playing mediator.  
Bones stood and watched as his friend confronted the captain and the Vulcan. Then it hit like a wrecking ball. To much. Pain. To Much.  
"Jim." He cried and began to fall back. Spock reached as did Uhura.  
"Len!" Uhura exclaimed. Jim turned quickly to grabbed him. Bones went all the way to the ground with a thud. Uhura knelt cautiously cushioning his head in her lap. Jim knelt down beside him grabbing his friend's hand.  
"Full Stop." The ordered obeyed Captain Pike came over and knelt. Spock stood and watched the scenario. "Leonard? Kirk what is going on?"  
"I don't know." McCoy screamed and arched off the floor. "Bones!" Kirk held him down and his right hand. Pike grabbed the left and steadied the doctor. Uhura stroked his forehead. His body went limp and his eyes opened blanked. "Bones."  
"To many, to many." Shacking his head as if to clear the fog away. "They're all dead."  
"Who?" Jim asked. Bones didn't look at him. He looked up at Uhura.  
"Ny," She smiled. "You weren't suppose to be here." She smiled. Bones look to Spock and nodded. Jim watched the full unspoken conversation. What did his friend know that Kirk didn't.  
"Len." She stroked his forehead again. "Who's gone?"  
"Everyone." He began to try and sit up. Jim tried to set him back down but Pike tried to get him up. Jim looked accusingly at Pike at his actions toward his friend. Pike eyes ordered.  
"Let's get him in the chair." Jim confirms as they help McCoy up and into the only chair quickly available, the captain's chair. Bones smirked up at Jim saying I'm in the chair before you. Kirk smiled back.  
"McCoy report." Jim glared at PIke. This was his friend. Jim had an inkling what was going on but this was a major big bang to effect his friend this badly.  
"The fleet. They're gone."  
"What bases do you have this on? We can't raise the fleet." Spock said determinedly unfeeling as he helped Uhura up. McCoy bent forward again. James knelt right in front of him. Everyone is watching the scene and Bones feels it and groans again. A new wave passes over him. Jim wants to bark at him to leave him alone but Pike holds him back.  
"He's an empath. He knows." McCoy shakes his head to clear it. Locking his hazel eyes on blue. So much deep pain their. So much concern.  
"Jim can you get my kit." Kirk knows what he is asking for. A suppressant, which Jim whole heartily believe his friends needs. Pike stops him as he is about to inject McCoy.  
"McCoy, There anyone else alive?" He shakes his head. The fog not clearing away yet. Pike takes everything in stride. He was informed the first year of them to keep Kirk and McCoy together. Never to separate them. Now he knew what the ambassador Troy meant. They grounded the other.  
"If there is it's getting masked by all the pain surrounding them. But that's not the even more important thing," he paused and looked up. "Somebody is very happy about what he did and revenge is making it even sweeter." Bones began to stand. They both steady him as he sways. "You better get in your chair."  
"Ok, stay on the bridge." McCoy nods weakly in confirmation.  
"Captain, raise shields, arm weapons, and emergency evasive, starboard." JIm stares at his friend and confirms the notion. His senses picking up off his friends abilities. Kirk looks to Pike and nods.  
"Understood." Pike takes his chair, Jim takes McCoy and lead him back from the center of the bridge. McCoy's head is killing him and sways. Spock grabs him. Bones looks at him funny.  
"It's you." Not accusing but realization. As if he felt more than what was said. Felt a different presence along the same aura. His eyes rolled. Spock took a firmer hold and lead him to his chair at his science station. McCoy immediately bent forward. Jim knelt immediately in front of him, concern radiating off him. Spock placed his hands on McCoy's neck and applied pressure.  
"What are you doing?" Spock stared at the two as they conversed. Vulcans are touch telepaths. He wanted to help the doctor but also wanted to confirm what he was told. He felt the true pain that was inflicted upon the doctor as he felt the fleet die. He simply stared at the man wondering how he was still functioning for he had no training in the area of mental focus. But then he realized Kirk was the helping factor. For KIrk had not relented his hold on his friend.  
"He applying pressure to pressure points."  
"And it's helping." A sacastic accusation at what the Vulcan was doing.  
"Yes, thank you."  
"You are welcome." Spock removed his hand.  
"Bones are you sure." Bones just tilted his head and glared. "Of course you are." Jim began to rub his friend's back. He wished his friend could shut it off but knew it was near impossible. Kirk had scored hi on his psi rating while his best friend scored hi on the empath scale. Together they got interesting results which scared some betazoids when they interacted together. A professor had even given them trouble for supposedly cheating when they didn't know what they were supposedly doing. That was when they got tested finally. Kirk looked up at Spock. Spock raised his eyebrow at that. "Bones don't move."  
"Buckle up." Kirk nodded to him rising. A little saying meaning so much. Kirk held onto the railing. He wanted to see what had happened to the fleet. Spock followed. Bones just kept his face in his hands. Here it comes.

Chapter 2: Discovery  
To Many: Discovery  
By: Wolfa Moon  
Disclaimer: Same as Before  
Summary: Part 2 in the To Many series. Hope you like. Enjoy.

 

Jim sat next to Bones on the shuttle as it flew higher into the atmosphere. It was the first year mid term halo jump. Bones had his eyes closed, no pinched shut. People were laughing and joking at him. One stare from JIm and they shut up instantly. Whatever radiated off him made everyone look anywhere else. Whatever happened after that he didn't remember. Kirk had focused so much on his friend. Imaging the world to go away that he didn't realize that: first) they had landed and second) no one was there. The shuttle was quiet and cold with long term shut down. Looking around he wondered what had happened. Turning to Bones he realized his friend was asleep. He wanted Bones to relax, but not that much.  
"What the hell?" He got out of his seat and knelt in front of Bones. "Bones?" he whispered. "Bones." He lightly tapped him on the face. "Bones!" He shock his shoulders. Bones head tilted up. Blinking his blurry eyes at him.  
"Is it our turn?"  
"Um," Jim looked around. "We're on the ground." Hazel eyes met blue.  
"I failed, wait did you jump?"  
"No, I was too focused on you. I don't know what happened."  
"Then let's get out of here." Bones fought with the harness but Jim's hands moved the surgeon hands away and undid the harness.  
"Yeah." They both stood up and made their way out of the craft.  
They walked to the hanger closet and returned their gear. Changing into their cadet uniforms they walked out into the promenade.  
"Let's get something to eat." Jim said as he slings an arm around Bones' shoulder.  
"Yeah and a drink."  
"Yeah." They began to laugh and head off.  
"McCoy! Kirk!" they both stopped laughing and turned. The halo ground commander came over. "Where the hell did you land? We've been trying to track you down. Come with me." They both sighed and followed the commander. Trouble.  
Inside they headed towards Admiral Traxein's office. The secretary motioned them to go in. Inside the office was Pike and the Halo Commander on the shuttle. The admiral stood up. But the Commander jumped right in.  
"How the hell did you do it?" Anger, Rage radiated off him. McCoy took an unconscious step back while Kirk stood his ground, and took an unconscious step in front of McCoy.  
"Enough." She, the admiral, had watched the whole display. "Commander Ricco you are excused."  
"But mam."  
"You are excused."  
"Yes, mam" he stood straight and left the room. The admiral came around her desk.  
"How did you do it? How did you convince a whole shuttle that you weren't there?"  
"Pardon?" She stepped up to them. Everyone knew that Admiral Traxein was a betazoids and skimmed surface memory when it was called for. And if need be further.  
"You cheated, how?" the two friends looked form one another then too the admiral.  
"We didn't cheat." Jim said. She glared at him.  
"It's true mam." McCoy stepped forward. "I have a problem with shuttles. Jim was coaxing me to relax. Then all of a sudden we were back on ground in the hanger. We don't know what happened." She looked at them both. Tilting her head with interest.  
"Pike, have these two tested. I want their psi rating on my desk my breakfast tomorrow."  
"Yes, mam." Pike stood from his chair and escorted the two out. As soon as they were outside Kirk turned to Pike.  
"Sir I don't know what happened. And psi rating? I know I am a little above average but I am not that good."  
"I know. McCoy what is your rating?"  
"Nul-Psi sir."  
"See. How could it have been us?" Kirk was livid as they approached the psi building. The building where any advantage was utilized. Especially the unusual and unique ones.  
Once inside they were put into two separate rooms then tested. Pike stayed outside the rooms. McCoy's came out first. She turned to Pike.  
"He's nul psi but his empath rating is sky hi. No wonder he is such a great doctor." She handed over her report. "Are you sure he convinced a whole shuttle that they didn't exist?" Pike nodded. "Then we should probably test him with his friend."  
"I agree." The other tester came over. He nodded to his associate then to Pike. "The boy is good, for human. But I don't know about the shuttle."  
"You think those two together did it?" Pike looked between the two testers.  
"Yes sir," she answered.  
"Then let's get them together." Pike issued. The two jumped to it. Pike moved into an observation room. Kirk sat at the desk staring at the mirror. His tester came in to stand beside Pike. McCoy entered Kirk's room with his tester.  
"Now that is unfair. You get a female and I get a guy."  
"Guess they know you to well JIm." McCoy sat next to him. The tester sat across from them.  
"You both rated hi on different scales. Cadet Kirk you rated hi on you psi rating."  
"Which I was told already." He smiled at her. She smiled back.  
"Don't encourage him." McCoy said.  
"And You Cadet McCoy rated hi on you empath scale."  
"Aawww." Kirk said and leaned into him. "You do feel."  
"Get off you infant." The tester beside Pike shock his head.  
"You ok?" Pike asked  
"He radiated." Motioning with his head to McCoy. Pike nodded. The male next to him tilted his head. The woman tilted hers.  
"What did you do?" Pike turned to the window.  
"Told her to threaten McCoy."  
"Why?"  
"Because. He is nul psi. Kirk can block her but he can't."  
"Trying to provoke a reaction." The man nodded.  
McCoy bent over and grabbed his head. Kirk stood up and grabbed for McCoy.  
"What are you doing? Let him go. Stop it." Kirk moved McCoy closer to him. McCoy buried his head in his hands and into Kirk's chest. McCoy began to scream. "I said stop it. Stop!" the tester was flung against the wall and pinned there. McCoy stopped screaming. The tester still held against the wall. Pike and the male tester entered the room.  
"Let her go." The tester ordered but he was flung outside the door and it shut. Pike looked to the door then to Kirk.  
"Kirk stop." Kirk stood up and began to step toward the female tester.  
"Jim!" Jim turned to Bones as did Pike. McCoy stood there swaying. Kirk immediately went to McCoy's side steading him. The fem. tester sliding to the floor. Pike went over to the tester.  
"We're leaving." The two exited. The tester turned to Pike. Pike turned toward the tester who watched them exit.  
"You ok?"  
"Don't ever separate them."  
Kirk sat beside McCoy in the starfleet cafeteria.  
"You ok?" Bones looked up from his dinner.  
"I will be. What the hell happened in there?"  
"She was hurting you. I stopped her."  
"Why would she do that?"  
"Get a reaction."  
"Boy did you give her one," Kirk smiled. They both smiled. "But you're good?"  
"Yeah, why did you scream."  
"She made me see, feel something that I locked away. It hurt."  
"What was it?"  
"I'll tell you someday."  
"Hold you to it." McCoy huffed at that. "Think they'll tell us what is going on?"  
"Of course they will." A new voice entered their conversation. She looked average but her high class apparel gave her away. "I'm Ambassador Troy. My daughter sent me to speak with you." The female tester they thought. "Yes her. Very impressive for humans." She looked them both over. "You are both impressive." She leaned over and took McCoy's face in her hand. Jim bristled when she touched him. "I won't hurt him." She stared into his eyes. "I see. I apologize for my daughter." She stroked her hand through Bones hair. Jim laid a hand on Bones. Radiating mine. "Oh he is yours." Bones looked up at her then JIm. "He is quite protective. Leonard," He turned to her. "A suppressant will help in the future. I suggest a regular dose if you don't want the feedback. Drinking isn't really a healthy medicine."  
"But one I like," they both smiled. A private conversation.  
"Yes, have a good day gentlemen." They watched her exit.  
"What was that about?" Jim asked. His hand rubbing Bones' shoulder.  
"Just proving that there are nice mind readers out there."  
"Yeah but what did she say to you." Tapping his temple. McCoy looked down then smiled at Jim.  
"Don't let anything ever separate us."  
"Good. I'll keep you to that." They both smiled. Jim's face turned serious and lost. "Bones, will you stick to it?" Bones looked to him shyly. He smiled.  
"Of course kid. Somebody's got to put you together when you break yourself." Jim brightened.  
"That's right, my CMO."  
"Only in your dreams."  
"Nope, when I'm captain your CMO."  
"Thanks."  
"Your welcome."  
"Let's eat."


	2. 3: Go For A Walk 4: Sims Happen

Chapter 3: Go For A Walk  
To Many: 3: Go For A Walk  
TM3:1

Jim jabbed a hypo into McCoy's neck as soon as they hit the turbo lift. "Kirk, what did I tell you."  
"He needs it." McCoy was practically leaning on Kirk. Pike watched them as he composed himself. "McCoy?" he looked up. "Did youu get anything before he gave you that?" He nodded.  
"He's anger. Rage. It overflows through him." He breathed and straightened. "There is something else. But I'm an empath right. Jim you get anything?"  
"I'm not like that. I can only get hints and things."  
"And what does that mean?"  
"It means that I can't do anything." Pike took a threatening step toward McCoy. Kirk Stepped unconsciously forward.  
"Threatening him won't get any response like that." McCoy stopped the turbo lift. "What are you doing?" He looked to all in the room.  
"I'm a doctor. We have injured." The door opened. Spock stood there not moving. They both looked to Pike.  
"Are you sure there is nothing else?" McCoy just glared at him like he was an idiot but his eye had pain around them. Finally easing with the drugs taking effect. Kirk winked to McCoy.  
"See you soon."  
"You'd better." McCoy ran off. Door closing Pike looked to Kirk who seemed to melt into the wall. The atmosphere was thick and tangible. Kirk was doing something. Either unconsciously or deliberately, Pike couldn't tell. Pike breathed in a deep breath. What the hell? Then with a flick of a switch it was gone. Kirk's eyes opened and looked around. Realizing he did something.  
"Sorry." Pike smiled. The doors opened to the shuttle bay.

TM3:2

People kept on pouring into one of the only surviving sickbays. McCoy entered into chaos. The drugs in full effect he jumped into the siege.  
The outside world didn't matter at the moment.  
James T. Kirk was out there saving the day.  
McCoy had just finished one patient and began to move onto another. A spike of lost ran deep through him. Toppling over a bed. He had several nurse running toward him. He tried to wave them off as he tried to regain some sense of decorum. What the hell? He thought. Closing his eyes he went over his breathing and focused on it. Three years of training to get better control. The best control was with Jim. But he wasn't here right now. Focusing it. Following it through the ship. Through all the other pain that was around. This lost was so unique it intrigued him beyond the norm. Normally, he would lock his shields up iron tight. But this broke through all. Such a unique signature, an intriguing scream of anguish. His higher being found that it pulsed near another specific strand of emotional being. Someone he could read no matter where he was.  
Jim Kirk was standing watching Spock reach out to thin air. The lost readable on his face. Then he felt the welcoming trickle of another presence. Bones he realized must have felt Spock's anguish.

T3:3

Spock had just let Nyota walk back onto the bridge. He had secured the bridge and set a course. Now proceeding to go to sickbay and check on the captain and the remaining Vulcan High Council. The doors opened. Spock began to step out but was blocked.  
"Pardon me." But the figure didn't move. His eyes looked up to see the new CMO standing before him. "Doctor, I was just coming to see you." McCoy cocked his head to a side. He felt that the Vulcan was struggling before him. Moving his right hand from its resting point on his left elbow he pushed the Vulcan back into the turbo lift. Spock began to protest when the doors shut. Yet was stupefied when the brash, empathic, doctor hugged him. It felt different from the way Nyota did. Hers radiated emotion of sorrow. Feeling his pain and radiating it with her human heart. Yet when McCoy hugged him. It felt as if the emotion rolled on the waves. The man felt them, accepted them. Realizing that the man was welcoming his pain. No other waves trying to undercurrent his waves. His lost.  
McCoy went on instinct. His mind wanted to reach in and fix the problem. There was no way to fix this. So many, too many, are feeling the days emotional escapade. He had upped the dosage on another round of blockers. Through it all the unique signature remained of lost. Confronting it now he let it sink into him. Vulcan's really do feel. One final squeeze he stepped back from the Commanding officer.  
"I grieve with thee." Remembering his Vulcan tack. He wasn't the first Vulcan he had to give bad news to today. McCoy realized he was the most important Vulcan right now. Spock needed this.  
"Thank you doctor." McCoy nodded. The two proceeded to sickbay.

Chapter 4: Sims Happen  
To Many 4: Sims Happen  
By: Wolfa Moon  
Sum: Empathic McCoy  
Dis: Own nothing. Just an idea.

TM4

Sims are a part of life at the academy. Jim Kirk excelled at them. This was a rescue and retrieve op. They had stormed the front gates and were making their way inside. Several other explosions set by them or by the enemy blocked passageways and a quick shot to the hostage room. Things could never be simple. They had to find another way. Jim looked at the two who were under his command. He could go faster without them. This was a group event though. A sim that put him in command of the group. This boasted his ego. So far in so little time. They moved silent as Iowa night. Taking steps backward then forward. Tricorders blind in the structure. All on instinct. This particular skill, Kirk is gifted with an over abundance. He held up a hand to halt them. A sensation tickled his senses. So familiar yet dulled. It pulled to him. Yearned him to go down the passage to his right. It would lead them away from the room where the hostages were presumed to being held. One of the fellow comrades voiced that thought as he followed his gut. It had never steered him really wrong in the past. Why question it now. He ordered them to follow but keep safe distance.  
Moving with renewed purpose he followed the inner light till it began to pour and warm him. Warmed in such a familiar fashion. He yearned for more warmth. Kneeling he looked around the corner.  
The enemy was moving the hostage. A man was bound. Head covered. Dressed in royal regal attire. Robes floating and dragging on the ground around the person. Two men in front, 2 behind. One on each side. And one to lead the rope attached to the hostage. 7 enemies. He could do it. But at what risk? Motioning the others over. He came up with a plan. He would run straight at them grab the hostage while they covered him and fired their best not to hit the hostage. They still needed to get out of there. Phasers on stun. The hostage stumbled on his garments. The one on the lead rope pulled him. Making the hostage slip further on the ground.  
"Get up." He ordered. The hostage shuck his head. The hostage's head hurt. He had been nabbed and tied up with no explanation. This was not a good day. But it gave Kirk the opportunity he needed. He ran out firing at the enemy. His two comrades taking down the others. Kirk landed in front of the hostage. He pulled the rope for their hands. Only to have them pulled back away. The hostage sat back on his knees. Kirk tilted his head. Something was off. His gut was kicking so hard. Something was desperately wrong with this scenario. Kirk reached for the head bag pulling it off the hostage. They needed to rescue the hostage and secure his safety. The bag off, blinking eyes focused on him. His head tilted.  
Recognition.  
Kirk's blood boiled. In his hands is his best friend. Mouth gagged. Ears plugged. And he was sweating. Something was wrong. The unwelcome kick kept kicking. With hurried knowledgeable hands Kirk removed the gag. McCoy took in a shacky breath. Kirk hurried on the rest of the travesties that adorned his friend. The ears open to hear. The mouth opened to breath. Hands free to feel. But that was not the main problem. McCoy was sweating bullets.  
"Bones what's wrong?" Kirk asked. McCoy tried to get moisture enough to speak. But his mouth was so dry. One of his fellow comrades handed him water. Kirk offered it to his friend. He made to grab at it but his hands shock terribly. Kirk held the bottle tight and lifted it to his friend's lips. He drank slowly like they taught you to after a major event without water for a period of time. This only fueled his anger more. McCoy breathed as the water was pulled away.  
His eyes blinking. Still trying to focus. He could see his friend. Yet felt nothing through the fog that engulfed him.  
"Jim?"  
"Yeah Bones."  
"They gave me something. Something to dampen me. I can't. Don't feel right." Kirk brushed his hands over McCoy's sweat soaked brow.  
"Oh god." They had to get out of here. This was still a sim and would not get help till they were out. Kirk lifted his friend up. He tried to use his side of the duo magic to sense what was coming. They had been going to some classes for a while to expand on this. It only worked with both of them. They tried with others. Only able to spark the mundane things to happen. But the real magic was when they are together. Always keep them together.  
Nothing was going to stop Kirk from getting his drugged friend out of here. They moved through the structure with ease. When enemies came their way. The enemy seemed confused and walked the other way. Or simply didn't see them as they passed. His two associates following in shock. Not questioning though. That could wait for later.  
As soon as they reached the sim shuttlecraft. Kirk screamed for a medic. McCoy had grown weaker in his arms as they exited. Kirk realizing his friend was trying to help where he could. Exerting himself too much. Too much with a drug haze.  
The medic who was attending him was tracking his reading.  
"This isn't right?"  
'What?" Kirk asked. Emotion in every letter.  
"He's having an adverse reaction."  
"What?" Another man came over with Captain Pike following. He was observing the whole sim. For he is the one who set it up.  
"Doctor Puri," the medic acknowledged. "He is having an adverse reaction to the suppressant."  
"Which one did you use?" Kirk asked. Puri answered.  
"A simple Betazoid compound they use when they get to big for their mind."  
"But he's not betazoid."  
"What?" Puri looked to Pike for guidance on this.  
"McCoy is human with an exceptionally strong sixth sense."  
"Oh my." Puri pulled out his med case and rifled through it. He kneeled down next to McCoy and injected a compound into him. Kirk watched. He wanted to attack this man. Wanted to rip him a new one. Bare his teeth and sink it into his neck. Yet he was the only one who could fix this. "There he should feel better soon. Take him home and get some rest." Kirk growled at him. He lifted his friend into his arms. Looking to Pike. Pike nodded and hit his communicator. He owed them this.  
"Sight to sight transport."

Tm4

Kirk sat beside his friend. McCoy slept what seemed forever. Yet Kirk would not abandon his post. They had captured his friend right after getting done his shift. No time to rest. They had dressed him up in cloths he would never wear. Injected him with a drug to suppress him. Suppress his talents. Idiots. Jim ran his hand through Bone's hair. Feeling the calm that it brought them both. McCoy stirred.  
"Bones?"  
"Jim?"  
"Yeah." He said with a smile. McCoy felt it and enveloped it with all his empathic grace. Smiling back. "You ok?"  
"I will be." Bones tugged him down. Universal sign: get in bed. The two had slept in the same bed before. Mostly to comfort. Mostly when the other was sick or injured. For they were the only family the two had. Kirk laid down. McCoy would deny later how he cuddled close to his friend. But in this weak state he accepted. Needed to feel his emotional anchor. Jim smiled as he felt his friend radiate his gift. Something only he mostly felt. Something subtle to others. A wreaking ball to him. He felt safe now. He felt at peace. And for the longest time misplaced. He felt home.  
"Rest Bones. I'll keep you safe. I promise."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CH 3 Song: You always say goodnight: Juliana theory  
> CH 4 Song: Fountain of Life: Two Steps from Hell


	3. 5: Old Ways 6: Feeling of Home

Chapter 5: The Old Ways

TM: McCoy POV

Rage.  
Rage.  
That emotion and a dash of revenge. All the R emotions. Wanting them all to clear away. I try. But I am struck still as my best friends go up against a semi-emotionless Vulcan. He can try and hide. But it is there. Trying to get Jim to hear reason. To calm him down for his sake and mine.  
Then all is silence.  
Watching as Jim is hauled off. I am struck still. Spock looks at me. My emotion blank on my face. For they're so much then silence. Spock stares right into my eyes. Into my soul. His emotions getting back to a straight Vulcan norm. But I can feel his human side. The pain I had felt sweep over me in waves. Now smooth as glass.  
"Doctor you are no longer needed on the bridge. I suggest you report to sickbay." In shock I move to the turbolift. But instead of going to sickbay I follow the trail that the security would have taken Kirk.  
But I was to late.  
Shit.

TM: Kirk POV

Being dumped not only from the ship but his friend. Now I cross this ice hellhole to find a version of a man I desperately wanted to go round two with. But was even more interesting was when the older man went into my head. Saw his memories. His versions of us. But unlike his version his Bones was empathic. Or was but never registered or trained. A good southern boy.  
Letting a memory of his Bones taking him home to his mom's for the holidays. The first holiday he had in a long time. In such an enriching atmosphere. Also letting his mom learn that he was empathic. Then him learning a few family secrets.

TM: Kirk POV: Memory

The holiday season was approaching. Bone's mood getting even darker. Must have been because of the picture of the little girl on his desk. Learned a lot about the man. Especially about his daughter. Whom his wife was able to ripe from him. So he could only have supervised visits. No wonder his mood was darkening. Also wasn't good that during the holidays the hospital patient rate went up. Everybody celebrating their winter holiday.  
Just getting in from a late run I find my friend packing his bags. What the hell? I begin to panic. Is he giving up? No, no. Worry in my voice,  
"Bones, what's going on?" sure others were going away fro the holidays. But neither one of them said anything. Bones looked up at him while packing a bag.  
"Good you're here."  
"Yeah I'm here." Doubt set in. loneliness. Being left behind. McCoy's hands dropped from packing to rub his temples. Realizing it was me who was causing the pain I tried to reign them in. But I couldn't help it. I was watching Georgie leave me again.  
"Jim, " I look into his hazel eyes. They are hazed in a slight pinch of pain but then I se what I feel. A reflection. He smiles it away. "Hurry up and pack. I was afraid I was going to have to pack for you. And I am not going anywhere near your closet." I smile he wasn't leaving me.  
"It's safe. I clean them," he glares. "When I can." He smiles and continues.  
"Pack warm." I go to my closet.  
"Where are we going?"  
"My mother's." I stop and stare at him. He was taking me home. The underachiever. The throwback. The sacrificing fathers son. The player. The …. "Jim." The voice is stern. I look to him. "You are none of those things. You are a great man. And a best friend. So stop feeling sorry for yourself and hurry up. She'll be angry if we're late." She knew I was coming. A family meal. A proper family get together. I smile.  
"Sure thing bones." My heart smiles. So do his features. Feeling the warmth. So much warmth.

TM: McCoy POV

I was examining one of the Vulcan elders when I felt it. That signature that I could never displace. The elder flinched. Looking into her eyes. I wonder if she felt what I did. Or did she feel me and my gift. Expanding it a little to feel what the controlled woman before me felt. Her emotional control was faltering.  
"Would you please desist what ever you are doing."  
"My apologies mam  
"You are not betazoid.  
"No mam, I'm human.  
"Yet you have a talent, fascinating." I smile at her.  
"One of a kind.  
"No not one." Looking into her eyes I see a tiny bit of what she does. "You have great potential. So does the other you know closely. But there is a third. And when you are together. Nothing will every happen to thee. " Looking at her I wonder what sight she sees. "You must hurry." Nodding I let the waves take over.

TM: McCoy POV

Running to the bridge I am hit by the turmoil. They say Vulcan's are emotionless. Boys are they wrong. They are just in more control of them.  
I try to loan whatever we have to help Jim. But he ignores it. Maybe a little to help him breath. Facing this onslaught.  
Then the switch is thrown. Winding out of control at the change. I back away as struck. Shock.  
Then there are waves cascading along my shore. Welcoming them as they do. No longer a storm. But those glacier eyes look to me after looking to his patriarch. Knowing I felt his maelstrom. Breathing I sense him try to get back in control. Faltering.  
"Emotional compromised." I can only nod. For this is compromised to a Vulcan. Earlier I felt the same. Him trying to tame my maelstrom. But I was in full swing. Yet he was smooth as ice. My shores though were rocky as hell, treacherous. He had ejected Jim. The two never melding.  
Now his storm skimmed my shore. I let him pass but still held onto some as I felt Jim's waves of success, pride, fear, and an underlying of disbelief.  
"Well, congratulations, Jim. Now we've got no Captain and no goddamn first officer to replace him."  
"Yeah we do." I watch the storm settle in the captain's chair.  
"What?"  
"Pike made him first officer." Sulu informed us.  
"You've got to be kidding me."  
"Thanks for the support." A storm builds.  
"I sure hope you know what you're doing, Captain." The clip of captain like thunder.  
"So do I."  
My mind ringed as one more storm collided with Jim's wave that I was unexpecting. Damn, Ny.  
To much I falter back. So many storms in such a short time. Ny lays a hand on me. Her storm calm now. She is great with tones. Like me and emotions. Her's is voice. Nodding to her I'm ok. In the back of my mind I follow Spock. Feel it change. Following the rainbow of emotions then back to the calm quiet, subtle ripples. Urging to become more. Getting ready. Thinking. Planning. Just as we are now.  
Jim is trying to maintain the balance. Me just trying to maintain. Then the kid so hyper. So full of raw emotion. So uncontrolled. Jim staying close by. Being my barrier reef, man made.  
Now storms circle before me. Colliding into one. As the newcomer says. 'Fascinating.' Watching the storms meld.

Song: The old ways: Lorena McKennit

Chapter 6: Feeling of Home

SONG: Set Me Free: Casting Crowns

TM: SMF

The day had been long. And it was getting even longer. An accident keeping him beyond his hours at his work. Fighting for life. Turmoil all around him. The suppressants wearing off. Yet still forging on. Needing to. Save the life. Especially the small body before him. So torn inside and out. Lost her mother in the room next to him. Felt the death breeze by him. Had to let it go. Let them all pass. But this one. He needed to save. For do what you would want done for you. Especially in the regards of a small child. The hours catching up. Needing to survive. Fight through the storms and focus through the rain. A nurse blotting some of the rain from his vision. But her heart feeling for the patient on the table. So small, so tiny. A small little water spout on the edge of his horizon. Trying to reach her. Through all the storms he tries to focus on her. Get her to come closer. Offer her whatever she wants. Only if she came closer. The drugs hazing her but she still feels the pain from the crash. Dancing along his horizon. The wait till rescue. Now stuck alone. Crying for her mom to reply. Mommy, the spout storms. Reaching out for her. Telling her whatever she wants to hear in order for her to come to him. Promising her the dead. The spout comes closer through the storm. The rain letting up to allow her to come closer. The sun shinning. So bright. Shielding his eyes he still maintains his focus to grab her. Reaching out. The sun reflecting off the water. Reflecting off the water in her spout. It calling to her. No I can save her. Forging through the wind and light. As he gets closer it all stops. Just the spout before him. The warm sun shining on him. Sparking off the girl. Reaching out he feels her small spout twirl against his hand. Feel it hum. The sun shines brighter. So bright. The spout begins to evaporate. Lifting up off it's water source. No, no! Trying to grab the storm that flows through his fingers. Please don't. Don't. Gripping onto nothing. Cursing the warm light. Putting all he is into the spout. Please. Then it is gone. The light shines brighter. Warm. Welcoming. Feeling of home.

TM: SMF

Jim watched as the monitors alerted him to his friend's arousal. Bones turns his head toward his friend. Kirk jumping up on the bed beside him  
"Jim," wanting to ask what happened. Yet ended up with an armful of Jim. Then the hands on the sides of his face. Blue tear filled eyes staring into his hazel ones.  
"I almost lost you. I..." Jim crushes his lips into Bones. Shock running through him at his friend's response. After getting no response from the form under him, Jim pulls back. Each staring into the others eyes.  
"What happened?" McCoy asked confused at what is going on.  
"You..." Kirk has to breathe. "You died."  
"What?" McCoy tries to sit up. Disbelief. "What happened?" Kirk sat back. Gripping Bones' hand. Holding onto him. Making him grounded.  
"What is the last thing you remember?"  
"I was operating on a small girl." Jim looked away. Knowing the look from past experience. "She died." Nodding his head at confirmation at his friend's assumption. Resting back in shock. Looking up at the ceiling. Wishing for it to tell him why? Why did he have to lose?  
"You died at the same time she did." Hazel eyes searched his friends face. Asking him to continue. "Puri, assumed you were using your talent and got in to far. And you let it drag you too."  
Closing his eyes McCoy remembers the spout. Remembers fighting so hard for it. Urging it to stay with all his talent. Letting it take him. And it did. But then how did I get back.  
"Who revived me?" McCoy searched Jim's face. Jim prayed to the ceiling. How to explain. "Jim?" McCoy squeezed the hand in his. Catching his attention. Eyes locking.  
"I did." Curious and curiouser. "I felt you leaving me. Dying on me. I ran right out on my date. I had to get to you. Had to stop you." He hiccupped. The emotions began to pour off him. Sadness, lost, fear. A huge slice of fear. McCoy never knowing him to be this afraid. sat up to his friends attention. Jim turned his orbs on him. So intense at how close he was to being lost in the warm light. The one that called him as it called the girl. "You had just been moved onto an OR table. They shocked you so many times. Puri was about to pronounce you when I arrived. I felt you slipping. I don't know how but. I couldn't let you go." Tears began to fall down his checks. Jim never cried. Even all battered up. Never. But he was now. McCoy pulled his friend to him. Jim wrapping his arms around him. Locking them in around his friends. The tangible reminder that his friends is still here. Placing his ear over his pulse point. Feeling it beat under his ear. "I screamed at them to stop. I held you tight. You didn't respond." McCoy felt the lock squeeze him close. Never wanting to let him go. "I prayed to whomever was up there." Taking a deep breath. Calming to continue at the recent nightmare. "Then I just begged you to come back." McCoy closed his eyes. Trying to remember the details. He remembered the light. Remembered it's warmth. Then a voice calling from the shore. Crying. Begging him to return. The onslaught of a storm pulling him closer from the light. But the storms he knew. Storms he always had. Never this warmth. Looking back to the storm. Hearing his name called. Not Len. Not Leonard. Not McCoy. Not even Lenny. But Bones. And there was only one storm that called him that. It was tearing at his shoreline. Such ferocity. No storm like it. Turning from the warmth I touched the storm. Instantaneously grabbing him and pulling him back. Len opened his eyes at the memory. Jim had pulled him back. Kissing the fools head and nestling his head on the other. Jim nuzzled in closer.  
"I almost lost you." McCoy let his arms fall from around the other. This caused Jim to move back to look into his friend's face.  
"You'll never lose me. The dynamic duo." The title that was named them for their constantly being with the other. And other perks. The talent. Jim smiled. Tears drying on his check. Bones lifts a hand to wipe away the remnants of the storm. "Jim," never finishing for his lips were on his. Closing his eyes he let the storm he knew so well envelop his shores. Getting swept away in it.  
Letting it take over. Hands roaming. The rain soaking into his skin. Air exchange. Winds blowing through their hair. The softness of the beach under them. Weight pressed into the other. Accepting. Taking each other in. Orbs of color staring into the other. Promising to never leave the other. To fight for the other. Through all the storms, stars, and shiny days. To keep the other warm.

Feeling of Home.


	4. 7: Counting Waves 8: Mighty River Flows

Chapter 7: Counting Waves

TM: CW

Sitting on the shore. Watching the storms bounce and collide off one another. Not daring to touch any. For my shoreline is finally calm. After so much I just want to relax. It needed one hell of a clean up. But that could wait. But one storm approaches. My reef isn't there to protect me but this storm is a drizzle compared to others on the open ocean. This one I'll let me cool me off. Feeling it touch my shores. Touch my neck. Let it soak in before I look up into the rain.  
"Doctor."  
"Spock." We greet.  
"You need to rest."  
"I will." Rubbing my well worked hands over my tired eyes.  
"I mean your talent." Looking up at him, "I can feel you out there."  
"Sorry, never realized I was so loud." I was practically a mute back on earth.  
"You aren't trained with Vulcan methods but betazoid." I shack my head.  
"No just my own, method." He nods as if taking I learned to balance on my own. Surprise.  
"I wish to assist you in helping 'tone it down'. To deal with Vulcan's in the area."  
"I'm pretty good at letting which storms close."  
"Storm?"  
"Imagery." I answer to what I use to view them, and calm them in my head. "Coastlines touching the shoreline. Me the shoreline." He nods in understanding.  
"Fascinating." Now here comes my barrier. His emotions pouring in huge drops but controlled near me. But picks up a little at the new acquaintance.  
"Spock," he acknowledges. "Bones," he steps up onto the left side of me. Realizing now I was boxed in on both sides. Jim lays a hand on me. Welcoming the touch. Both waves. A relaxing bob. Bending my head forward I accept. "Bones, you okay?" I snort.  
"Long day." He smiles. Feeling it.  
"Understatement." Squeezing my neck. Working the muscle.  
"Don't stop." He laughs and moves to behind me. Spock hand trails down my arm. Still holding onto me like a tether. Keeping him grounded. Accepting all he throws at me on that end he hides. Accepting it. I groan as Jim works out the knots. "Marry me."  
"And disappoint all those lovely ladies in the universe who have yet to experience James T Kirk."  
"Gods forbid." We laugh at the old argument. Spock squeezing my wrist. Picking up my hand. I curl my hand and stretch it out. He rubs his fingers along mine.  
"Kissing is different with humans." Jim says. I just want to melt. It feels good.  
"Feels nice." I let the shore crumble away. I am the waves again. Rippling with pleasure, contentment. Everyone here safe. Everyone at home safe.  
"I am merely relaxing his katra."  
"And kissing him." The waves around me begin to ripple more. No, no.  
"Jim, desist this argument." The shock stunned Jim tightened his hands. Spock was helping. And Jim began to feel unsure. I radiate back calmness, acceptance. Some tricks I am good at. Especially with my best friend.  
"Sorry Bones." I can only bob with the waves. Spock continues to play with my hand. Beginning to slump. Feeling how tired I am. When did that happen? We all had been running on coffee and stimulants. Did anyone sleep? It was still Thursday right?  
"It is Sunday, doctor?" I look up to him. His eye quirks and looks to his hands. Touch telepaths. I've been up so long. "You have doctor. I suggest you rest."  
"What's going on?" Soothing hands begin to make circles along my overworked shoulder muscles.  
"The doctor has had no relief since this started."  
"I'm the chief medical officer on board. The only superior physician. Everyone else is dead." Jim leans his head into my hair. Feeling him breath me in. If I hadn't brought him on board. Chased him all over the ship and to the bridge. I would be lost as well. It would hurt possibly destroy the kid if I die. I know I am no great prize. But I never want to hurt him like that, again. Even with my death. He kisses my head. "Jim?"  
"I'm fine." I feel the lose, separation. Completion, friendship. That hole filled. "Nearly lost you." Wrapping an arm around him I let him mold into my exhausted body. Letting him know, feel I am still here.  
"I'm here." Almost lost you too. I feel the drizzle of Spock begin to get heavier and pull away. But I grab his hand. Letting him know he belongs here. He's welcomed. And he stays. Grabbing my hand back. Then the wave hits and I bend forward at the crushing weight. Escalating over my calm waves. So much pain. Seizing up I collapse over the desk. Both going with me. But also pulling me back.  
"Pike is awake." I inform them. But they don't immediately go. They cling onto me. Supporting. "Jim, I..." need to check on him."  
"You will, then rest."  
"You too. Both of you." I get nods and reassurance. Squeezes for emphasis. Sleep is good.

TM: CW

Waking up I feel a hand caressing mine. The slow movements up and down along each finger. The palm rubbed in deep circles. Just like one of the huge storms that skim mine on occasion. This one though was holding back his storm. Making motions of his storm inside of him on my palm. I let him motion. Let him center himself. Whoever thought a hobgoblin would find solace in me. I let him move down the fingers again.  
The main storm, my reef, laying beside me in the inadequate bed in the CMO quarters. Since I am that now. They are mine. Jim being the acting captain. And never really suppose to be here. But he is here. In the very place he belongs. His arms wrapped tightly around me. Grounding me. Securing me down from all the turbulence storming around me. Us all.  
Relaxing into the sensual waves from the Vulcan I fell my fingers dance with his. I knew about Ny and him. But why is he here and not with her.  
"Doctor," he softly whispers. My eyes open. He is a sillouet in the dark room.  
"Yeah Spock." He takes my hand in his.  
"I wish to grieve." Nodding in understanding. He is Vulcan. Emotion in full control. But with me he can let down his barriers and let himself storm to his hearts content. I really don't know what I am getting myself into. But I am a physician. Hippocratic Oath and all.  
"Go ahead and grieve Spock. I won't tell a soul." He nods in the dark. One hand grips my hand tight. The other moving to my face. Running his fingers through my hair. Letting him soak in.  
My beach still has debris all along it. Waiting for him to grieve. I watch the waves. Counting them as they begin to come up higher. They take away the debris. I know it is not I. I look along the beach and find a figure there. I have never seen another walk along it. Unless you believe the old poem about being carried. Well I wasn't being carried. Cause the form was coming toward me. Picking up debris as he comes toward me. I watch the waves lick at a piece of driftwood. I nudge it back into the water. It floats away from me. Looking to the figure he is closer and I can make him out. He has a good bundle under his arm. Moving toward him as well. Accepting the man. I fill a hole in the sand with some close by. Dig a hole, fill it up. I watch the waves again. He will come to me.  
"Hello Doctor." I smile. We are inside who cares head. Probably mine since this is my beach.  
"I think you can call me Leonard or McCoy now." He grunts in acknowledgement. Turning to him I see the pile under his arms. It is a heavy load he bears. Putting out my arms I try and anticipate the load. He hands me only one at first. A small piece of driftwood. A feeling of rage along it. I throw it into the waves. He goes to give me another solitary. His Vulcan mind organizing them out for me. I don't like to wait. I like to storm right in like the ones around me. "Just give me them all Spock." His eyes look burdened more that the wood he carries upon him.  
"I believe it will be to much."  
"I am a doctor Spock. And besides you're here. That means a big one is lifted already." He looks cautiously at his burden. He grabs a good few and hands them to me. My knees buckle as the emotions ripe at me. Damn. No wonder he didn't give them all at once. But I really want to sleep. I want him to rest, peacefully. I take them in and drop them. The waves lapping around my legs. Just at ankle height. He reaches for more. Eyeing him I tell him to give it to me. "Spock, please." For he is crumbling under the weight as well. The sooner this is done. The sooner he will rise. Conceding to my will he moves the burden to in front of him and hands them to me. Rage, Fear, Sadness, lonliness burst along my senses. The water rises around us. Bending my head I feel the ripple. My body shacking at the slight onslaught. Not to bad for a Vulcan. He must have expressed some in the past. Good boy. Letting them drop into the rising tide I look to the last piece in his arms. It is a good hunk of wood. The wood though looks to be covered in a moss. A fine sheen of green. Holding out my arms he is reluctant to let it go. A prize among the debri. It is a fine piece of wood. Rare among the woods I know in memory. Holding out my arms. He stares into my eyes and hands it over.  
Greif, love, joy, warmness.  
The feelings spike through my senses. I crumble into the lashing waves. Holding the wood tightly to my chest. The wood isn't wood. It is his mother. He is kneeling before me now. Hands on the wood. Accepting some of the emotions back. Good Vulcan. I place a hand over his. My water rinses off the others. Cleaning the piece of wood in front of me. The moss getting washed away by the waves. A truly rare and special piece of wood. This one is a keeper. The emotions of every mother in it. I hand her back to him. Looking into his eyes I watch him pull it close. His eyes brimming with wetness. He wishes to grieve. Letting the rinsing waters recede I pull him close to me. Letting the love she is in the piece envelope us both. So strong. The wood melds into air. Inhaling her in. forever keeping her close. He wraps his arms around me. Accepting him. Letting him grieve.

TM: CW

The next morning I wake with Jim snuggled on my right and a Vulcan nestled on my chest. A nice warm blanket. His one hand griping mine. The other still in my hair. Jim has a hand on Spock's back. The other gripping my other hand. Jim looks into my alert eyes. Smiling at the welcomed addition.  
No longer a duo.  
Three musketeers.  
He leans up and kisses me. Then kisses Spock's head. Smiling at him. I feel warmth. Radiating the emotion. Spock snuggles closer. Accepting us. Accepting his mother.  
Nuzzling his hand that resides in my hair I look to the ceiling.  
These beds are too damn small for three people.

Chapter 8: Mighty River Flows

Looking up at the storm above me. I focus on them. Anything to get me from focusing on what is really going on around me.

Tm: MRF

I watched the waves hit the beach and over my feet. Georgia had beaches. But my home was surrounded by earth. Terra firma. Why do we have to go up? Running away from it wouldn't help. Also my emotions making everyone around to act like I felt. Anxiety, fear, on last nerve. Not a good vibe to present to others. Damn flight thing.  
Fight or flight. I was fighting. No way in hell was I flying. This fear enveloped me. Guess it had to deal with all the crash victims I had under my hands. They prescribed therapy. I went, talked. Wipee. Then I had to go to training. Which was ridiculous. They had me try and learn their ridiculous methods. Focusing on a sphere and tones. None of it worked. The emotions still crashed over me. Still unused to so many people around me. I taught myself how to deal with trauma and harsh emotions through my years at the hospital. Some of the love and happiness of family and marriage. Wait, Marriage had both in my case. But the other ones don't really categorize. But are always there. Scheduled under something else.  
Secluding myself to the beach seemed like a good idea at the time. But the clouds overhead gave way to storms on the horizon. Smiling I realize that is how the emotions are around me. Everyone a storm or rainbow. Closing my eyes I watch the shores. Safe on my beach. The waves lap at my feet. This is nice. Looking up and down the beach. All by myself. Few pieces of wood here and there. Remaining emotions I gathered. Feeling others that have remained. Turning my head I spy trees. Trees of my own making. Emotions I wish to savor and keep safe. Spying one I let that one sway in the singled out breeze. The wind swaying the beautiful oak. I feel my father so proud of his doctor son. The love we had for each other. I watch mesmerized as the tree sways. Smiling. Haven't felt this good in a long time. Then there are drops on my face. Damn storms. I try and focus back on my father but the rain is persistent.  
Damn. Closing my eyes I push my father away for another day. Turning back I look up into the rain. Letting it soak in. it get's colder and begins to get more forceful.  
Fine! I leave my beach.  
Then I am here on the beach in San Francisco. The day had turned into a cold night. And there in front of me was my downpour. Screaming and shaking me. Blinking back into reality I focus on him.  
"Jim," I shiver. When did it get so damn cold? He smiles.  
"Thank god." He looks up. "Come on. You're freezing." Getting up slowly I feel the coldness. It had rained since I came here. Jim grabs me and we make our way back to our room.

TM: MRF

Back in the room I am stripped of my clothing and reprimanded. Him ranting the whole time wondering what the hell I was doing. He pushes me into the shower and I shake. Damn I must of hit a stage of hyperthermia.  
"Trying to get yourself sick to get out of flight case is really not gonna fly." Shivering the warmth slowly returned. But I didn't have enough time to in the shower, as I am quickly pulled out. Guess so I didn't use all my water ration in one go. Need it for tomorrow after the flight. Then into the bedroom. He wraps me in a towel and dries me off. I still felt the chill. Not the chill of other emotions for once. But physical chill.  
"Damn I'm cold."  
"Yea think. You only been sitting through a thunderstorm." I shivered. Letting him rant. For once not me the one to. Not realizing how long I had been zoned out today.  
"How did you find me?"  
"I used that weird connection thing we had." My eyes meet his. Asking seriously. It was too much effort to speak. My teeth chattering are the only noise coming from my mouth. He smirks. Then shrugs. "I followed my gut… Mostly." He rubs the towel viciously over my hair. Knowing it is sticking in every scarecrow given direction. The way he moves I know he was worried. Still is. "What were you thinking?" Sighing. Breathing in the warm air to stop them from chattering.  
"I got fed up with all that betazoid crap. Follow the sphere. Relax with the light. Listen to the signals. Focus on the lines. It wasn't working for me. So I just…BBrrrr." Shivering is a good sign. Not to far into the cold depth. But damn. Need to tell him or he will never let me sleep this off. Looking up at him I try and plead.  
"Went on your own to figure it out. I told you I would be by you in this." I snort. It is a two way street. Thing is he only sees one way. Shacking my head I let myself tilt. If this is his one way street. I'm just gonna lay in the middle. Let whatever crafts come and plow me down. It's Jim's road and I'm safe there.  
Going down I feel him grab me.  
"Get up." I'm so tired now. He gives me one last good pat down. Then tucks me under the covers. Feeling his worry radiate. I don't really want to feel. Feeling the satisfaction of finding me. Squeezing my eyes shut to block out the world. Admiration. Admiration? Smiling I sink into being admired. Haven't felt that in a while. Yeah on occasion I have had some eyes on me. But this is Jim. One who is a half of me that we can do anything together. Survive anything. At least I know that I will never be abandoned. And him too. The love. Seeing my beach. My way of dealing with my talent. The skies are clear now. Beautiful hews. And there is the rain storm. Not far off my shoreline. But there. Blocking any storm from coming close. Keeping the waves mellow.  
Jolted from my beach when a warm naked body joins me in bed.  
"Dammit, Bones, you are ice." He shivers at the contact. I shiver at his contact. Still wraps himself around me. Nuzzling into my neck. "Don't you ever do that to me ever again." I turn to look at him. "You had me frantic. I thought.." you lost me.  
"Never Jim." I snuggle back into the warmth. Needing to keep him at ease. "I can't stand people trying to fix me when I can do it on my own. And I did." I wait for a reply but get none. So I forge on. "Much better than anything they taught me." I sigh. "Sure there are flaws. But I'm only human. Not betazoid. Which they can't seem to get their heads wrapped around." Jim nodded. It was true. On more than one occasion Jim and myself had to correct everyone on their speculation of my abilities. Saying sorry. Earthman through and through. Shivering hopefully for the final time I begin to bury my head into the pillow. Relishing the body behind me. The warmth. Can feel him rub his hands along my chilled skin. Getting my circulation moving.  
"Jim?" I am really tired.  
"Yeah," he moans.  
"I'm tired."  
"I know." He still continues. "Just relaxing you. So we can get on that flight tomorrow." Shivering at the reminder. His hands don't stop. They feel everywhere. Making me feel. Relaxing I can feel his emotions. His lust. Damn kid, I want to sleep. If I am going to be sick tomorrow on the shuttle. I want sleep.  
"Jim, I'm scared." His hands stop moving resting on my chest.  
"Why?" Cause if I fail this I fail you and can't join you on this undiscovered country.  
"I don't like flying." Nice cover.  
"I know." He scouts back away. He probably is lying on his back. I don't want to face him. Coward, I am. "Bones?" I don't move. He does though. Wraps his arms around me again. "Can you focus on one person yet? Zone out enough to get by?"  
"I take injections for that. And I can kinda. Still learning. You're easy." Old dog, new tricks.  
"Yeah, so focus on me." He squeezed. "I'll be right beside you."  
"Promise?" I ask quickly.  
"Do you even have to ask." I shack my head. He buries his warm body behind me. Kissing the back of my neck. Yeah he will keep his promise. And so will I. never leaving. Never fading. Always by your side. "Go to sleep Bones. I'm here." Yeah you are. Relaxing more into water.  
"Good night Jim."

TM: MRF

The next morning I look at the shuttle. He claps me on the back. I focus on him. The line of rain just off my beach. No he is more beautiful than rain. Turning him into a beautiful coral reef. A slight barrier from the waves. I can do this. Focus on the different shapes of coral. The buzzing energy that lives there. Nothing going to stop it from growing. Not if I can help it.  
Stepping into the craft I freeze. Then the wind blows along my beach. My father tree swaying. Assuring me I'll be safe. Looking to Jim. With him I'll always be safe. I can do this.  
And I did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CH 7 SONG: Counting Waves: Sarah Fimm
> 
> CH 8 SONG: Mighty River Runs: Globus


	5. 9: Fall in the Light 10: Labor of Love

Chapter 9: Fall In The Light

TM: FL

The ship limped home. All aboard exhausted beyond belief. Working overtime. Finally in space dock. Ordered back to base. The exhausted senior staff all on one shuttle. The last shuttle to arrive. For they are the heroes of earth.  
Kirk looked around at his senior staff. Chekov was leaning into Scotty. Scotty placing a protective arm around the lad. Sulu head tilted to the side. Eyes watching the Enterprise fade from sight. Kirk can admit he side glanced at her too. Making sure she is still there. Then he looked to the rest of his staff. Most importantly the man beside him. Bones was beyond tired. Beyond his limits in all talents. Pike given better odds under his hands than any other. Especially with his background in neuropathy. The best hands.  
Arriving late to the shuttle. Batting down the hatches before getting on. He missed the position arrangement his friend is in now. McCoy had his head resting on Spock's shoulder. His left hand in Spock's with Nyota placing a hand over top. That is a weird couple. Kirk wondered did she mind that he was leaning toward our side. Guessing not. He watched his friend sleep. At least he got over his fear, kinda. Taking his friend's hand he ran slow circles over them. It had been a hard month. They literally limped back. With the fleet elsewhere. They couldn't assist them. Some Vulcan refuge ships stayed beside us. Following us to their only salivation at the moment. McCoy's hand trembled under his. The sensation must of past to him. But not penetrating the haze. Spock though looked to Kirk.  
Kirk could only smile back. Looking at his best friend than to where his other hand rests. He could share his friend. If he had to share him with someone. Smiling, realizing, it would be them. He is so damn tired.

TM: FL

Just so damn tired. The warmth under his check moving. Speaking.  
"Doctor," it spoke. Spoke in a voice all to familiar to him now. Grumbling, I sit up and try to move to the a better position. Landing against another warm cushion.  
"No, no, Bones time to get up." Groaning I sit up. That voice I know all to well.  
"Jim, I'm tied."  
"I know." Feeling Kirk swipe a hand over his cheek and through his hair. "But we landed and need to present the heroes of the enterprise." Hearing the sarcasm in his voice. Kirk never realizing how special he is. I see it. Always have since the first hungover day, plastered day on the shuttle. Great opening line. Sharing a drink. Distracting me from this space.  
My hands go to rub the grit from my eyes. Opening them I am greeted to the senior staff looking at me. Worry, gratitude, happy, playful, and a thank god. I can only groan as I stretch and hear my back pop. Standing I am beside Kirk and Spock.  
"So how do we do this?" Kirk looked to Spock. Spock looked at everyone as they looked to him for the answer. He straightened. Mind going glacier calm.  
"The others shall precede the captain." Feeling Kirk take an unconscious step toward me. His one and only backup. But now there are more. This staff so honored to be with him. Resting a hand on his shoulder, I smile.  
"Let's get this over with. " the others nodding. We all look to one another.  
"Who's first?" the hatch opens. The roar of the crowd is overwhelming. One hell of home welcoming.  
Gratitude. Happiness, Love. Lost. Greif. Praise. The wave hitting me so hard I stumble back. Only Jim and Spock stopping me from falling on my ass. They escort me to a seat. Kneeling in front of me. Spock taking my hand and stroking it again. I can feel Nyota and a wave of jealousy. I cringe. Blinking the emotion away I look up as Spock glares at her. She shakes her head. Turning away from our scene. The others though stand by the door. The crowd continuing to make noise.  
"Guys go out one by one. Give us some time." Aye captains, we're spoken from the staff. Jim placed a hand on my shoulder. "Bones, focus."  
"Trying," I grit out. My beach is not clear. I'm surrounded in a fog. And the waves are lapping like crazy at my feet.  
"Doctor," Spock speaks. "Focus on one item to calm. Don't worry about the other." Focusing again. The fog I can deal with. Barely see through it. But the waves are still crashing one right after the other. That is what I need to calm. Building upon my reef. Focusing on Jim I let the reef grow to a stronger wall. The waves lap but not that badly. Then a warm presence is beside me. The fog dissipates a little. Opening my eyes to reality. I feel much better. Jim smiling at me. Feeling the connection I made stronger. Than Spock who I let warm me. He nodded. I close my eyes and smile.  
"Time to face the music." Standing I have both my shields on either side of me. But I stop at the door. You can fit two at a time through it but not three. Looking to Jim. No, the captain. He should have the honor of being last. Laying a hand on his shoulder.  
"See you at the bottom of the steps." Jim nods not trusting to voice back his worry. But turns to Spock.  
"Watch him for me."  
"I will." Shacking my head.  
"And you call me a mother hen." Clapping a hand on Spock's shoulder. "Let's go." We approach the door. Looking over my shoulder at Jim. He smiles nervously. "We're here for you. See you at the bottom." Basically, I love you.  
Blinking into the sun, I step out. Hearing people cheer. Other's calling my name. Flashes of media lights going off. Spock and I side by side walk down the steps. Then I stop to looks back. Jim hasn't appeared. Come on Jim. Focusing on him I feel him radiate. Nervousness, unsuccessfulness, loss. That won't do. Being brave I raise my hands in the air. People cheer but I put my palms out for silence. The Starfleet personal recognizing it and shushing the others. The water calms.  
"Presenting to you!" I shout. He needs this. "Acting Captain, James Tiberius Kirk." The crowd goes into a frenzy. The kid an instant celebrity. I watch as Jim steps out onto the top platform. He waves and smiles. Then looks to me and nods. Spock takes a step but I wait. Watching him become a god amongst men. But he is still my reef. Spock stops a few steps down. Than Jim waves big and come down the stairs. Throwing an arm around me.  
"Thanks," he whispers in my ear. We both smile as we reach the bottom. Spock stands there for us. Jim throwing his other arm around him. The media going crazy over us. Over Jim. People begin to get close. Bumping into us. People reaching out to get a touch. I go still. People shouting all our names. Especially KIRK! Security is trying to keep people back. But they still get through. The waves crash again. Then a warmth engulfs me. Opening my eyes. Spock is beside me. Hand wrapped tightly around my wrist. Eye contact asking me, am I alright. I half smile and nod, for now. We move back a little. But Jim follows us and moves to us. He gloms onto us. Not wanting to be alone. Guess I'll have my picture posted alongside his. But I'll just be chopped out,  
"Leonard!" Twisting my head to my name I search the crowd. My name gets called again. I try and go toward the familiar voice but a vice grip holds me in place. Spock won't let go. Keeping his promise to protect me. Smiling at him. He quirks an eyebrow. My name gets called again. Looking toward it I yearn to see who calls. People begin to shout questions. My eyes though look around. Seeing Chekov hugging a girl a little shorter than him to him. Family's moments caught on data streams. Sulu being enveloped by his parents. Uhura surrounded by her family. Scotty looking around the crowd. Sticking close to Chekov. Guess there is something. Chekov taking in our stowaway passenger. Hell I take mine to my family all the time.  
"Leonard!" the voice shouts again. Twisting my head I see a blur. Damnit. Closing my eyes I let myself wonder along the shoreline. Trying to find the one who calls me. I know I really don't work like this but I can always try. The fog is around me. But I feel through it. Letting Spock tether me. Walking along I stumble over debris. Who is it? I move away form the waves. More toward the tree line. Then something radiates and I reach for it. Touching it. An elm. Beautiful. Arms stretching wide. My father's oak beside her. My mother. Grasping it.  
Grabbing Kirk I secure him to me. He looks grateful. Lost for a moment in the crowd but safe again. He latches onto me and I pull them with me. Toward the elm. The crowd tries to bombard us. But I won't be swayed. Stumbling along the debris. Then there she is. She comes over and envelops me into a hug. So much warmth and love there. Thanking god for saving him. She hugs me tight as if I was one who was lost amongst the stars. Like my uncle. But I came back. She let's go and hugs Jim. The media going wild. For the first time noticing the big screens showing what the streamers are recording. Family moments. Jim laughs and hugs her back. She steps back and appraises us. Then looks to Spock.  
"Well boy aren't yah gonna introduce me." Scuffing my feet like a child. I always felt like a child around her.  
"Momma, Spock, Spock, My mother." Spock takes her in. Feeling the warmth shudder. Oh shit, his mom. I try to get to him. Bowing my head I let his storm crash. Wavering he grabs me.  
"Mrs. McCoy," he greets. She notices my reaction sees the lost in his eyes. Notices him as Vulcan. Knows about them. But doesn't matter. She bowls in and hugs him. Seeing that I accept him. Allow him to touch me. Hold me up. Now he is family. I watch Spock stiffen. Jim and I both smile at this. Then he returns the hug.  
"Welcome to the family." She tells him. Then she appraises us. "You boys need some home cooking."  
"I would love that." Jim groans at the memory of her cooking.  
"I'm sure yah do." She pokes Jim in the stomach. He smiles and lays an arm around her shoulder. His second mother. Hope Spock will accept her too. Not letting go of Spock I grab my mom.  
We plow our way through the crowd. Making the rounds to the other families of the senior staff. Knowing we will be called before the admirals soon. Going over every detail of the mission. Discussing the dead. The events. Who did this? Who did that? Why did you do this?  
Why did I bring Jim Kirk on board? I'll take a court marshal if given one for my responsibility on that. We wouldn't be here if not for me. Knowing I broke protocol. But who gives a damn. Jim Kirk, the Hero of Earth. Hero of my heart.  
Making our way through the crowd we get to an awaiting deluxe hovercraft. Inside the craft are two other gentlemen. Both older gentlemen. Both Vulcan.

Chapter 10: Labor of Love

TM: MCCOY POV

The ride is quiet. I try and read them. Spock squeezes tight. Telling me to stop. I do. We sit three abreast. My mother joining the two older Vulcan's. Spock greets them  
"Hello Father," looking I watch the man I've seen on the bridge raise his hand.  
"Greetings Spock." Looking at the other man. Obviously a relative. Before the man can speak. Jim speaks.  
"Spock, how did you get here?" The other older man smiles. A Vulcan smiles.  
"It is good to see you old friend." Now I am lost. "Good to see all of you." Looking around at everyone. Spock studies the man. Old friend.  
"What the hell is going on?" Everything stops in the car. Everything is calm. The one who looks a lot like Spock turned to me. Obviously Jim and Spock knew who this man is. To hell with manners. I radiate, throwing out my talent. He shivers at it. Spock tightens his vice grip on me. Knowing I am going to be bruised. Forging on. I sense he is calm. Lost. Emotional compromised. But then there is happiness, joy.  
"You are quiet unique Doctor." I huff. Rolling my eyes. He saddens. Now what. "I am Spock." Looking to mine than to this one.  
"Okay?" Jim smirks.  
"He's the alternate reality Spock. He's the one where Nero came from." I make quick glances around.  
"You're bullshitting me."  
"I am not bullshitting you." I collapse back into the seat.  
"Just great."  
"Calm down Bones." The other Spock smiles. Guess some things are the same on both sides. Jim pats my knee. Him leaning forward.  
"So what are you doing here?"  
"Checking up on all of you. Seeing that the timeline is put back in order." I sigh and close my eyes. It has been too long a day. "Making sure you are alright." Jim grunts.  
"We're great." He says and leans back. Against me. My mother laughs a small one as Jim melds into my side. Looking at the two Vulcans I let my thoughts go. Spock, my Spock. Damn how to keep them separate in my head. Prime not to bad a title. Could label him, R.O.G., Really old guy. But I held some part of that title. But I can share I guess. He is Spock after all.  
"You'll be better once I get you some cooken." I smile. My mother solving the universe problems from her kitchen.  
"Mmmm, sounds good." I respond. After surviving on Starfleet rations. Her cookin like heaven. Jim licks his lips. Spock ROG nods to her. Guess he knows her cooking as well. But there is something more. "So what is the real deal about this secret reudevue?" The older men straighten. Direct and to the point.  
"We are here to insure your safety and to make sure all goes as it should." Sarek says.  
"And if it doesn't" Kirk voices.  
"Then we will see where it leads us." Things have already changed. I lean into Spock's warmth. Can feel him keep watch. Watching the reaction from his father and the ROG Spock. Sarek seems to just accept. But ROG eyes widen. Who would ever think to shock a Vulcan? Obviously we can. "Are you all together?" he questions. I sigh. This is not the time to come out to the parents. My mother knows I play both sides. Hell I was married to a woman. More like a leech. It did have it good moments. No, that is the past. This is now. Not ROG's now. Our now.  
"And if we are?" I challenge. Kirk looks to me for hope. Always wondering where he lies with me. Right beside me. Spock's grip loosens and begins to rub in small circles with his thumb. Left side of me. ROG Spock nods in acceptance. Looking to my mom. She smiles. Accepting. Sarek, Spock's dad, looks stunned. Yup, we do know how to make an impression.  
"Than I wish you happiness." ROG relaxes into the seat. Something about it seeming odd. I want to search further. But I am just tired. Relaxing back into the seat. I go to my beach. Been a long ass day.

TM: SPOCK POV

I watched as Leonard sunk back into the seat. Relaxing along his coast line. Letting myself relax by soothing my hand over his skin. The craft had made it's way through the city toward a launch pad. Leonard would not be liking this. Quirking an eyebrow in wonder.  
"May I ask, where are we going?" Mrs. McCoy straightened.  
"We are going to my house. You boys need to relax before Starfleet bombards you with interviews and meeting. And what such." Through my touch on Leonard I fell him warm at her words. Realizing this is a good thing.  
"Can't wait." Jim voiced. He deepens his rest.  
Arriving at the shuttle we all limber out of the hovercraft. My father assisting Mrs. McCoy out. The other Spock stands as well to assist. Jim goes next tugging Leonard along. I follow. Relinquishing my hold on him for a mere moment. Myself quirked at the lost of connection. Needing it more than I realized. Once out I watch as Leonard staggered toward the craft.  
"Not another one," he groans. Mrs. McCoy laughs at her son's antics. She goes in followed by my father.  
"Come on Bones. I'll let Spock knock you out for the ride."  
"Good, could use a nap." They both enter. I will do whatever is needed. At the door the AU me waits.  
"We should talk." I can only nod. My thoughts going to help my friends.

TM: SPOCK POV

We arrived at the farmhouse. The weather warm. Not as warm as my former home planet. But just as nice. The food was quiet delectable. Standing on the porch I watch as Leonard in the late dusk ride a horse around the paddock. Bareback, if I recall the riding style correctly. Jim observing him from his position on the fence.  
"He always did love the earth. Hating crafts. More fearful of transporters." Turning my head lightly I look at the AU me. He relaxes across from me on the other support. "Leonard, is very much like our mother." I start at the reminder of her. Focusing my attention more on the one we are discussing. "Mother hid her talents well." I clench my fist. Yearning for control. The emotion still raw to my senses. "Forgive me, for bringing her up. I just learned of the lost." I can only nod. My eyes looking to my fellow officers, friends.  
"Did you're Doctor have this talent?" He huffed. Probably for referring to Leonard by his title. Not his name.  
"He was a talented doctor." He seemed to straighten. "He was a good friend. One I cherished till the end of his days." He seemed to sag under the weight of his memory. "We shared many a times together. The three of us untouchable when together." He lays a hand on me. "Never let them go. Never lose contact with them. Accept them for who they are. For you will miss them when they are gone. Part of you're … Katra." He stumbles at this. Looking more at the man. Seeing what the lost of these two men had done. Knowing that they would someday die. For Vulcan's lived longer than humans. But such grief.  
"Bones!" I hear the shout. Turning I see Jim jump from his post past the horse to kneel done on the ground. The grief.  
"Leonard," I say as I leave the elder behind to attend my friend. Jumping the fence I come to beside Jim who is helping Leonard sit up. Taking his hand before it can reach his head.  
"Bones, what the hell happened?" We both observe as he tries to get his bearings. Jim looks to me. I look down.  
"The other Spock, he was informing me of his acquaintances with you're counterparts." Jim shacked his head. He had gotten some glimpses of that. Some views of them through his eyes.  
"Damn, hobgoblin." Jim smirked at Bones.  
"You okay?" He nods to the question.  
"Yeah, fine. Nothing hurt but pride."  
"Pride doctor." He looks up at me.  
"I'm a good horseman. I should be able to stay on him."  
"Doctor, you were hit with a wave of grief. You could not anticipate what the effect would be while upon you're horse." He looks at me. He pulls his hand away and begins to rise. Staggering up he quirks his eyebrow at me.  
"And what did you learn?" he moves back and to the horse. I watch as he calms the steed. The instant spirit calming under his touch. Then the beast rubbing into him. I continue.  
"That you meant a great deal to him," he huffs and mounts. "To me." I add, "Leonard." He looks down from me upon his horse.  
"About damn time Spock." Tilting my head. I have accepted him. Jim claps me on the shoulder.  
"Welcome to the family." Jim smiles at me. The beast comes closer.  
"You still have time to back out." Looking up at Leonard.  
"I will never do that." He smiles at me. I smile back.

TM 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CH 9 Song: Fall in the Light: Lori Carson
> 
> CH 10: Song: Labor of Love
> 
> AN: TY for sticking with this. The relationship changed a little I know. What the muse wants, she gets. I asked if anyone wanted a smut one. And I may just do that. I'll keep you posted. TY so much for your reviews.


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